Discussion with Daniela Arieti

In these extraordinary times, when we are all asked to isolate ourselves, and when many of our members and partners have to face unprecedented situations, we want to express our solidarity and strengthen the community we belong to. That is why we are launching the #SolidarityOverDistance campaign today. Physical separation is very reasonable to prevent further harm now. At the same time, we believe that the most important now is to stand together, and to share our troubles and hopes. 

Listening to the news every day, we are worried about our friends and colleagues and we want to let them now that we care. On our channels we are going to offer a platform to share updates from them. What challenges are they facing? How are they coping with the situation? Professionals within our network most often provide services for people who experienced harm or people who are dealing with the consequences of a harm caused by them. They are typically in a very vulnerable situation, and the current crisis makes their status even more precarious. When will a mediation process be able to go on? How can a harm be repaired when human life and our social co-existence is in jeopardy? Through these short updates and interviews we also wish to share the thoughts of professionals in our membership: how are they dealing with these extreme professional challenges. Please join our campaign and share with us how do you experience this crisis. 

As a first update, we share our discussion with Daniela Arieti. Daniela is a mediator at the Restorative Justice Centre of Trentino Alto Adige Region. Currently she is lockdown at her hometown, Valeggio sul Mincio (close to Verona), which is in the most affected area in Italy by the Covid-19 outbreak. 

How people are coping with social distancing?

I see different ways of coping with the social distance: trying to get more information or give proper information (for example from municipalities); cooperating to help vulnerable (elderly) people, to get their medicines, food and so on; finding new ways to support each other through social media (Facebook groups of support / entertainment / information in many cities); offering psychological support (in my city there is a free phone service for people who need it); home delivery from markets that don't usually do that service; e-learning or online lessons for students. It seems that some people are searching for new ways to let others feel their (positive) presence.  This is also what restorative justice can do: the so called "restorative attitude", that is the “treasure”, we can use also in this situation of inability. Help people to think about the future, to imagine how it will be possible to overcome the consequences of all this. Many people are suffering, many are losing beloved relatives, many are having bad consequences, for example they lost their work, many are scared and worried.  

There could be / will be a lot of restorative work to do: can restorative practices put our energies together to restore this present, thinking about a different future?

What is the impact of the situation on you personally? 

My life has changed a lot since two weeks ago: I'm locked in my house with my four years-old daughter. I really appreciate the existence of social media channels: I cannot see my mother, sister and friends, and my baby cannot see her dad, grandma, cousin or aunt, but fortunately we have the possibility of seeing each other through video calls.  What I miss most is time together with people I love: an aperitif with friends, a walk in the nature...

It is hard, but I feel lucky! I am lucky because I have a garden and I can go out with my daughter to play, and she can ride her bike or skate or run. I am thinking about people who don't have this opportunity. It must be hard.  It is difficult to manage the everyday life with a child who wants to play all the time, and there is home work to do, and a house to clean in order to maintain a healthy environment.  But in overall I am lucky because all the people I love are fine, and we are okay at home. All around me, in the closest cities, the Covid-19 disease is murdering many people.

I feel a bit sad because I cannot help others, as I usually do volunteering in the Red Cross: it is becoming too dangerous for me and my daughter. And it is dangerous for all volunteers. Last week, after a young volunteer in the close city of Brescia passed away because of Covid-19, they decided to cancel all volunteer rescuer's shifts in my city. I feel quite stressed and scared, but I am also appreciating this time at home. I have to, I want to. There must be a sense!

What is your strategy to cope with the situation?

In these circumstances my strategies are: creativity with my baby. We are drawing and dancing and singing and cooking… everyday something new. I appreciate calm and slowness in work. I even have time to read articles and stuff!  I am trying to focus on what I really miss and think at what I can learn for my future. The best strategy is to think at Covid-19 as an opportunity to stay connected, and to support others as much as possible. Of course I can only say that because I am healthy! 

I am trying to understand what my life can take from this. For sure this time can help me to recognise in reality what I already knew: the significance of collaboration, taking care of each other, compassion, empathy, sense of community. If we live as individuals and we think as individuals without thinking of others, we won't survive. Other people and our natural environment are essential! Maybe I knew this before but now I see this concept more close to me!